Groothuis on the Delayed Apocalypse

Classic Groothuis:

Given the tremors of fear and panic gripping the nation, Congress has passed a bill extending the deadline for the conversion of all television broadcasts from analogue to cable. I am so relieved.

First, the civil government should have no say in mandating something like this. Let markets decide the matter. That saves us from all the public service announcements, confusions, and so on.

Second, it is pathetic how deeply this affects some people. It is as if their lifeline is in danger. I hear adds by bureacrats warning that if one does not make the proper call and do the proper thing, the screen will go blank (just like the minds already watching the screens). Of course, there are no publically-funded advertisements warning you that television undermines reading and critical thinking, that it wastes time and habituates people to unreality.

My dream: On the dreaded day when the analogue dies, all of television mysterious dies with it. All screens go blank and black; the roar of white noise engulfs the planet...and then we move ahead.