On Encouragement

People fail to encourage others for many reasons. Here are a few:

1. We believe that by encouraging other people, what we are truly saying is that they are better than us. Or, if we don't encourage people, then we feel superior to them. Our idol is our own self-esteem, and it stands in the way of encouragement.
2. We believe that most encouragement is not actually true and is therefore inauthentic. In truth, finding true, encouraging things to say to people proves too challenging.
3. We convince ourselves that what helps people grow is pain, not praise.
   

What these beliefs show is that (1) We misunderstand what encouragement is, and (2) We misunderstand what the purpose of encouragement is. Acts 11:23, it seems, helps makes clear what encouragement is, but also frees us from our normal impediments that keep us from encouraging.

"When (Barnabas) arrived and saw the evidence of the grace of God, he was glad and encouraged them all to remain true to the Lord with all their hearts."

1. Notice why Barnabas was provoked to encourage them: because he had seen 'the evidence of the grace of God.' So, most fundamentally, the reason we encourage people is not because of anything they have done but because of what God has done.
   
2. And this makes sense insofar as our gifts are just that: gifts from God to us. The learned are learned because of God. The athletic are athletic because of God. The musical are musical because of God.
   
3. Encouragement is unhelpful when it is meant only to bolster self-image. What is important is not how good you look, but how good Jesus looks. The reason Barnabas encourages them to 'remain true to the Lord' is because, apart from Jesus, what they have just isn't worth encouraging.
4. Or, this is good news, because depending on the praise of men for what you have/are will always end in misery. But depending on what Jesus has done for you (paid your debt) and does for you (makes you righteous) will always end in joy.
5. This will surely lead to great humility and courage. You are made humble because you finally realize you are a terrible sinner and need a great savior, but also that anything good in your life (your looks, money, brain) is not really yours. You are made confident because Jesus was glad to die for you and that you have been adopted by the God of the universe.
   
6. So we encourage not to make people feel better about themselves, but to make them more cognizant of Jesus.
7. Negatively, when we do not encourage, we make them less cognizant of Jesus.
   
8. The reason we don't encourage, ultimately, is because we have forgotten the gospel. Or, we have forgotten the very thing that should be so encouraging to us.
9. Ultimately, this is freeing because encouraging becomes less about us and more about God. When the basis for our encouragement is the gospel, seeing the grace of God in the lives of people, we will want to encourage.
   
10. If you have a problem with #9, you have other issues.